DAY 178

SO I GOT A PR TODAY UP NORTONS, AND I THINK IT WAS THE HARDEST THING I'VE EVER DONE AHHA. So Griff Freelee and I met at 7:45 to do a warm up lap then came down to wait for the Super Elliots to pass by. So there's a super fast group that goes up every saturday called the Super Elliots and because they're are races on this weekend, they were going at a slower pace than usual today so the plan was going to be to just jump on with them for as long as I could hold on. And while we were waiting by the side of the road for the group to show up I was honestly so nervous I wanted to throw up ahah. I just put so much pressure on myself and just didn't want to dissappoint myself or Griff! My old PR was 17:47 so I just wanted to beat that, but I remember when I did that PR that it was just so painful, when I finished I was so fucked and seeing stars, so I just wasn't sure if I had any more in me. But Griff told me he'd only be disappointed in me if I made an emotional decision LOL. Anyways so what felt like hours (it was minutes) passed and finally the supers flew by us, and we jumped on at the back. But RIGHT AWAY I knew it was just way too fast for me, I was like giving it everything I had and couldn't keep up, so after about 500m we just dropped off, and I just stayed on Griffs wheel. Freelee was trying to hold on and she would've been able to stay with the group and get a PR BUT she accidentally pressed the pause button instead of the lap button on her garmin, and when she realized that she was devastated and dropped off. I felt so bad for her, but at the time I didn't even know what was going on, all I was thinking about was just staying on Griffs wheel. Jens dropped off too and so it ended up being Griff, Jens, Freelee and I going up. Man it was a wierd TT for me. I was just really shaken by the start with the supers, and emotionally I was all over the place, and I just kept dropping Griffs wheel and it was hard for me to keep the power down. Griff had to encourage me and motivate me so much earlier than usual. But by the last hairpin I was finally getting into the rythym and feeling good and motivated.

But obviously by then everything was HURTING LIKE CRAZY. I just couldn't catch my breath, and I honestly felt tears in my eyes. My legs were screaming at me and everything was just on fire, but I almost got into this numb state and by the last stretch I just gave it everything I had. And honestly at the time I had no idea what my time was, Griff didn't really ever say if it was a good or bad time so I kinda thought we didn't get it, but after crossing he told me we had! But I was so fucked I had no energy really to do or say anything. After rolling for a bit, I had to get off my bike and just spit out all the flem, but I had no energy so my flem wasn't coming out clean it just ended up getting all over my arms and legs lol, and I stayed there hunched over just spitting and catching my breath for a few minutes before I felt like a semi normal person again ahah. I also tasted blood in my phlegm which I've never had before. BUT man today I just took the pain to a whole new level, I've never felt pain or pushed myself that hard in my entire fucking life. And it was such a high. We rolled to the tap and just squatted and chatted, but we were getting colder by the second. So eventually we rolled back down, and Griff, Jens, Emily and I did another lap before heading home. When I got home all I wanted to do was upload my strava, but of COURSE the wifi wasn't working. So I spent over an hour talking to the Wifi people trying to get technicians down here since I've been having wifi issues for ages. And I wasted so much time doing that I didn't have time to cook anything for the vegan picnic so I ended up just buying some rice crackers and dip :( Then Nicole picked me up, and WE WENT TO THE PICNIC! eheh it was just such a blast, I met so many new friends, and a few people that followed me on insta and youtube which is always so lovely. I just grazed on fruit, cookies, popcorn, samosa's and more. I also took a little bit of a nap with Shannon at one point because we both TT'd and were both a tad fucked lol. I also spent much of the arvo chatting with Kais and Martin about our many injuries and accidents, and snuggling with Emily since we were both so chilly ahha. And by 5 ish we finally decided to head home. I made rice with frozen veggies then finished an entire box of sustain cereal for dessert ahah. Then I watched a disney movie, replied to youtube comments, and went to bed before 10 heeh.