One of my friends asked me why I'm so emotional, why I cry so often and feel so deeply. "Just try to turn your emotions off, stop being so sensitive" he says. "That way maybe you won't get hurt so often."
Now I know he meant well, but asking why I cry so often...
Well you might as well ask me why I laugh and smile and jump for joy so often.
Because you see... for me to not feel everything I wouldn't be me. I am sensitive. I'm not afraid to admit that I am sensitive as heck, and I remember and internalize more than is good for me, I know that, i do. but telling me to let that part of me go would be akin to telling me to cut off an arm. This is who I am at my soul and spirit. I am an empath, intuitive and deeply sensitive. The reason I cry so easily and hurt so much is the same reason I laugh so heartily and love so deeply. My joy can be as bright as the sun but my pain can also be as deep as the sea.
You see, a life without laughter, love, cake or joy just wouldn't be worth living to me.
But a life without tears, despair or heartbreak would make those moments of joy empty.
I would rather live my life with my heart open to all the intense emotions of being alive than closing myself off to a numb life of mediocrity.
When I cry it reminds me of the humbling immense struggle it is to live a life of meaning, and how that struggle unites us.
And when I laugh, the joy in my heart soars out of my soul to dance among the stars.
I feel it all, for better or for worse because I have no other option.
For joy would not exist without sadness, and sadness would have no worth without joy.
And so, I can either choose a pain free life of quiet numb desperation
Or I can choose a thrilling pain filled life full of fierce feeling wonder.
So for better or for worse l choose wonder, I choose to feel the good, bad, funny and sad.
I choose to feel the fear, doubt and uncertainty that can sometimes feel crippling and suffocating.
I choose the daring magical adventure of living a vulnerable, messy, human life.
I choose despair, I choose joy, and I choose love. I choose to feel it all,
because I choose life.